And yet another self-indulgent post …
I have to confess that I do believe in Fate. I know that a lot of people don’t, but in my mind, and possibly because of events that have happened in my past, I do. I don’t believe in coincidence. Everything that has happened and will happen does so for a reason. Whether this is because of some Ultimate Being, some sort of Alien Experiment [ook, who put that so-called new planet in our Solar System?] or just simply because I can’t say; I just know that it seems right.
And two years ago Fate stepped into my life in a big way and changed the course of my life to suit its desires.
I was piddling around on the Net enjoying friendsreunited.co.uk, catching up on the things that my former classmates were up to. There was an advert on the site for Match.com and as a joke, and because it was free and anonymous, I created a profile. I didn’t expect to have anything substantial occur because of it and indeed, the responses that I did get were full of innuendo’s and obviously from chaps just wanting a bit of ‘Ow’s your Father. I chose to ignore them.
Then on the 19th of March 2002 [two years ago tomorrow, hence the timing for this post], about two weeks after I created the profile, I received a mail that wasn’t like the rest. This mail was rather delightful and revealed a person with a thoughtful and witty nature. This person wasn’t make suggestive comments, or assuming that I would even want to meet them. They were simply being chatty and pleasant and seemed interested in me as a person, rather than me as a sex-machine.
So I replied immediately. Well, I had nothing else to do at that time …
The following day I received a mail back. Again it was fun and interesting. I began to warm to this person. So once again I replied. And so began a correspondance. I learnt a lot about this chap and he learnt a lot about me. We discovered what made each other tick, what we enjoyed, what made us chuckle, the shows we liked to watch on the telly, our favourite books. We discussed issues that were current at the time. Yes, the sex conversation inevitably came up. But it wasn’t in a horrid way. It was a pleasant discussion that enabled us to discover more about each other. I never had any cause to not believe anything this chap was telling me. I trusted him implicitly from the very beginning. That was my trusting nature shining through.
We’d been mailing each other for almost a month when I decided that I couldn’t wait any longer and I wanted to meet him. I had met other chaps off the Net, but that had always been at their decision and looking back I had never felt truly comfortable with meeting them in the flesh. [Ouch, that makes me sound like a slag. I only met three chaps over eighteen months and I wasn’t a harlot, I swear .] This was my decision. I was the one who was in control. So one Saturday evening he came over. We watched Shrek and drank a little alcohol. We chatted about everything. We were both a little shy to begin with but by the end of the evening I felt as though I’d known him for yonks. And I just knew that I wanted to see him again.
And so began my relationship with The Blokey.
I know that some people are wary of using the Net as a tool to find someone. For myself and The Blokey it worked. For many others it doesn’t. Yes, he could have been some psycho axe-wielding nutter, or married with children, or really smelly, but I trusted my inner judgement and it didn’t let me down.
I just thank Fate that I was led to create a profile, and that the profile happened to be one that landed in the lap of The Blokey.
It’s a succession of What If’s. What If I had never had the courage and strength to get out of a violent relationship and kick The B*****d out of my flat, What If I hadn’t become ill and moved back home, What If I hadn’t had that particular day off work, What If I had decided not to create a profile, What If he hadn’t read my profile, What If mail hadn’t been running smoothly and I hadn’t received his mail …. ?
Fate, God, Guardian Angels – call it what you will. Things happen because they’re supposed to. I do believe that. However silly it sounds. In a sense it scares me because it means that perhaps I don’t have Free Will, perhaps it does make me merely a puppet with somebody else pulling the strings, but in another sense it makes me feel all snug and warm.
Fate Bless Fate xxx Elsabeth