Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.

[the processional]

Going to bed at ten in the evening is usually a good thing, but not when you awaken at four in the morning and find it impossible to fall back into a peaceful slumber.  Matters are not helped by your Mumsy, who happens to be sharing your bed and asking you daft [panicky] questions. 

It rains whilst you’re at the hairdressers.


[the middle bit]

It stops raining and the sky turns blue.  The air is crisp.  People are nattering away in Czech in your living room and the car arrives far too early.  Your flowers are more beautiful than you ever imagined.  You trip as you get into the car … you knew it was going to happen, you’re so clumsy.  There are pesky people getting married before you, delaying you, creating nerves in your belly that weren’t there before.  You almost burst into tears before going into the ceremony room and don’t remember this till the next day because the minutes following this are just a happy blur.  The Blokey whispers that you look stunning and he didn’t recognise you.  The Superintendent Registrar pronounces your surname wrong and you correct it when you repeat the words; you catch the eye of the other Registrar at this point and both laugh.  The Superintendent Registrar still pronounces it wrong, and so does The Blokey, causing you and the other Registrar to laugh again. 

You hope this doesn’t make the marriage a farce.

Both Mumsy and the Brand New FiL almost cry when they do their respective readings, and it seems that The Blokey has forgotten to ask his Baby Brother [and BestMan] to be one of the witnesses.  Bloody idiot.  You talk non-stop in the car on the way to the reception venue but have no recollection of anything you said.  You drink Kir Royale and laugh at the children. 

children Toben

[the recessional]

By the evening your feet are killing you.  Your Father spends quality time with grandchildren he has barely seen before.  Everybody who means anything to you shares in your joy and eats the scrummy food your nana paid for.  You haven’t stopped smiling all day.  You find it difficult to indulge in your favourite tipple and as for eating … well.  The DiscoMan hears your plea and makes everybody join you for the First Dance.  Bless him.  You fall into bed and read through your guestbook messages from the people who care.  And then you sleep, tired but ecstatic.

tayma  dad

[the honeymoon]

You drink lots of beer, eat out in lots of restaurants, indulge in wicked afternoon hanky-panky.  You make a little video in Anne Frank’s hiding place but it gets lost in CyberSpace.  You wonder who uses the Neon-Lit Girls and you get drunk on a romantic candle-lit cruise.  You come home with sore feet and willy shaped salt & pepper pots.

grafitti disorder

[the rest of your life]

It’s all a tad surreal really, like it never happened.  Except there’s a diamond encrusted wedding ring on my finger and it sparkles.  Lots.

Back to normal now, eh?

please God bless my marriage xxx Elsabeth


  1. It sounds wonderful! (as such things should be) Congrats! (again – I’m just so tickled for you!) RYN: A baby shower is a party for the mother-to-be where stupid games are played under the guise of entertainment. (for example… one is given a ball of yarn and told to cut off the length of yarn big enough to go around the waist of the poor unfortunate pregnant woman. The closest length determines the winner. The “winner” gets a small token prize. (I won a votive candle)) All of these games are baby related… The main reason for the occasion, really, is to supply the expectant mother with gifts for the soon-to-arrive bundle of joy! I’ve no idea why it is called a shower… This does have a practical side as a new mother will need loads of new items and clothing and what-not before the baby arrives!We have bridal showers, too – for (obviously) the soon-to-be bride. Unlike the baby shower (although small gifts are given to the bride) the main purpose seems to be for the families and friends of both the bride and groom to get to know each other a bit! Actually, no- that isn’t exactly right as these events are attended by only the women of the family – not the men. But, still, inane games are played… (of the getting-to-know-you type)

  2. glad you saw the graffiti in amsterdam.i don’t usually take pictures with the strap in the way. it was good judgement on my part not to delete it straight away. i’m going to share mum’s photos with you (so you’re not lumbered with only my pictures). and if you get an anonymous-looking package through the post tomorrow, it’s from me – okay?tbb sbr sjd etcps. very brave to put your image on here. cameras steal souls.pps. if you want to share the anonymous-looking package with anyone, just let me know…ppps. a salt and pepper pot shaped willy? i would have thought you’d have checked that out before you married him.

  3. I know I should be squeeing delightedly and all right now, but let me just say this first: You look SO MUCH like my mom when she got married. It’s quite scary, actually. Not that you’re scary. You’re so lovely! Just as a bride should be. =P I’m so, so excited for you and the Blokey! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. Awhhh. Have fun “honeymoonin!'”
    I envy you! You’ve found the love of your life and you love him and he loves you and you both no longer have to go out there and do the scary dating thing anymore where you turn into a neurotic mess from the dating sharks.
    I’m happy for you!!! And from the very blurry photo, you look a blushin’ beautiful bride. Your father looks like he’s partying hard–with that fierce expression on his face! Cute kiddies!!!!

  5. Sounds like a great time was had. As for it getting less surreal wait until you’ve been married a couple of years it will be far less surreal. LOL

  6. Jane and I did drink a toast to Mr and Mrs Blokey on your wedding day. Nobody else around the table knew what the feck we were talking about, which made it even better.
    L xx

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